shatterdriven | Seasons Inbox

You've reached Nine.

If this is important or an emergency, I'll get back to you as soon as I get your message. If not, I'll get back to you when its convenient and if I feel like it. I'm not making any promises either way.

I won't waste your time, so don't waste mine.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

sonic_wachowski

And you're kind of grim and I'm a weirdo.

Sometimes solutions just come up and you go from there even if they're weird.

I know what I'm not gonna do. Doesn't mean a situation is futile.

From:

shatterdriven

Keep telling yourself than when it's plainly spelled out to you, Sonic.

[If he thinks he can solve it without having to resort to worse than murder...he's in for a very rude awakening.]

So, how many have you found? I know how many there were from my source, but not how many were taken period.

From:

sonic_wachowski

I know what you're implying, Nine, which brings up a lot of 'how' questions, but let me try and figure it out. I don't like going into a situation thinking there's only ONE solution.

That's how you get mass murder sprees and I ain't a fan.

Thirty-three so far.

There's one big spot and still more stragglers. But I figured the big spot is best later. Shadow's absolutely following me right now and I want him close if I had to set off a big burst of chaos, he'd be on me so fast.

From:

shatterdriven

What you're doing is being optimistic about something that doesn't really matter and that you shouldn't have to worry. You said you trust me and I'm asking you to trust me about what I know.

Besides, you're very "There's only one way it ends...badly" about your chaos energy no matter what anyone says.

[It's a valid point. It's not a good look to not trust someone in so many ways when you say you find them trustworthy.]

Then you should probably aim for solutions other than a big burst of chaos.

From:

sonic_wachowski

[He shrugs.] I have trust issues. The fact I didn't burst through your door is my trust. But I got stages. I mean...you saw some of why. [The dreams and all.]

And I'm not saying my chaos energy only ends badly. But it can. And if it does, that's me being used to hurt people and that...

[He frowns.] I don't want that. But I'm willing to let people I trust to study or use it, I just need to be careful. Because there is a big chance of it ending badly.

I mean, that is the hope, but a big gathering means most danger. Shadow's the back up plan.

From:

shatterdriven

Trust may come in stages, but even I know not to tell someone I trust them and then do the opposite. Especially because I know not trusting anyone well.

So you can't fully use that against me because my trust is just as fragile if not more. And nothing breaks it faster than a lie about where we stand.

[It's his turn to shrug.] I also get that from experience in doing the harm even if I didn't start it...including to my own body. Same thing though. I have personal opinions on that, but those weren't the point.

I suggest if you have concerns you have more sound plans, or less drastic backup alongside Shadow. You could take some of my Pokemon, or Grim Birdie.

From:

sonic_wachowski

I said you were trustworthy. Not that I trust you. At least in the level you're wanting.

I know you can be trusted, but trusting deeply is...

[He pauses. Foot tapping on the ground. Thinking over what they talked about in the dream.]

You saw me treating my injury as a kid. That was....my only option for a long time. I didn't even have the option to go to a professional.

[Now he's pacing. Trying to dig out the words.]

It was make do, or simply not make it. And its....

Trying.

To trust and rely on people when things have been....

[His hand reaches up. Fusses with the short quills. The quills that are still taking so long to grow to a proper length.]

Stressful.

Is...

Not a habit.

I've been trying to better about it, but its an....easy....trap. I'm hoping if I get all my quills, it'll be easier to....be...better.

[He stops, his back to Nine, arms wrapped tight around him.] I still haven't been able to talk to anyone about what happened except the person I don't need to explain anything to.

....I could bring the Pokemon. I might damage Birdie if its a chaos burst situation.

From:

shatterdriven

Saying someone is trustworthy does come with the implication that you do have some trust. But it's also subjective and just not something I'd do. But trusting me saying that it's better for you to leave this alone isn't that deep. It's as simple as why you don't put your hand in a bonfire.

[He listens as Sonic goes on, but while he can empathize, he can't sympathize very well. He's not sensitive to these things the way Sonic is, and not because he's a bit older than the hedgehog. He was never allowed to be sensitive because it was unsafe.

He just had to push forward by himself because there wasn't anything to compare it to.]

As far as being forced to rely on yourself, you're not saying anything I haven't also been through. I didn't even know what professional treatment was before I got here or that it was something lacking. And I was forced to take care of myself because no one else would. They pretended they didn't see me. My tails still haven't recovered even years later and with the knowledge how to take care of them so they thin fur looks more natural. I'll probably have the physical evidence of why I'm how I am for the rest of my life.

[He walks over to Sonic.]

I'm not saying that you just need to get over it, because I haven't and have no real desire to do the same. But I also know when to accept that I'm in a situation outside of how I ever would have had to do...anything in my own universe and to take what others are telling me into account if I don't know what I'm up against.

I have to touch people to survive and have a job that makes me deal with people. Two things I despise because they force me to ignore the things that have kept me safe my whole life.

Wanting your quills back so you can work on processing and recovering better is fair. Being reckless and evasive not so much.

[A pause.]

The two I'm offering are both susceptible to electricity so they're at no more risk than Birdie would be. So you can take any combination or all three.

From:

sonic_wachowski

And I do. Again, I didn't come bursting in through your window. I figured you didn't hand them over because you didn't realize it would bother me, and that was the case. Not because I thought you were hiding or using them.

[So its not like he has no trust.]

[He looks over at Nine, and at his tails.] Is that why the legs always surround your real tails? [A pause.] We...could probably do something about the damage. Later. Something to talk about later, but just if you're open to talking about it.

[He wonders if he can't fly with them like Tails does.]

[He looks down at the floor, hands rubbing his arms. Fingers digging in a bit over where the IVs had been stuck into him.]

My body is hard mode. I can....I can usually kick my own butt about a lot of things, but my body has...its always been a difficult thing. I love Maddie. She's great. She's kind. She's patient. She's mom. It still took three months before I let her give me a basic physical.

[So when it comes to his being a Project hang ups, its a tall order to redirect.]

I can't leave it. I have to handle it, one way or the other. Doesn't matter the risks. I'll never be able to sleep if I don't have a solid read on the situation myself.

[He knows himself too well for it.]

Chaos energy isn't electricity.

Its a power source, but its not electricity. It looks like it, but I've been hit by tasers and chaos energy. Electrified is just easier to say than describing it. Its like...a wave or...lungs filled with too much air or..... [He shakes his head.] But its not the same as being hit by a taser.

But organic take incidental shocks way better than machines do. Probably because chaos energy is alive and machines generally just don't handle it well.

From:

shatterdriven

If you had had so little trust, you'd have had another problem on your plate. You're not entirely too fast for me after all.

[He may or may not be trying to lighten the mood a tiny bit.

At the question, he opens the metal tails and lets Sonic see properly. Obviously trusting he's not going to pull them. The fur of his tails does look pretty healthy but it's not even half as full and fluffy as Tails' are, looking more like what you'd expect from a short-haired cat than a fox...ignoring the fact Nine in general has much smoother fur because his tails used to be extremely fluffy when he was a kid.]

It's part of why I picked tails over anything else, yeah. Even if the procedure was a pain. I could probably do something while I'm here since I'm Summer. But I'm not really set on the idea.

[He sighs, a hand on his hip.]

You're on your own for this if something happens, whether you do something regrettable...or something happen to you. I can't help you more than warning you.

The Chaos energy is close enough to electricity that it does count. Neither Echo, nor Ridge particularly reacted well to even a light tap. And the one immune to electricity and my newest reacted much less. So even though it's not true electricity it might be the case that for some creatures it's close enough that it affects them similarly. Not that I plan to just go around touching everyone's Pokemon with it for a bigger sample size.

Grim Birdie I've upgraded with special sensor that deploys a small barrier of Paradox energy around her essential components in response to Chaos energy. She could still take damage, but probably not enough to put her out of commission and definitely not enough to stop me repairing her.

From:

sonic_wachowski

I mean, there is a difference between 'no trust' and 'think is a threat.' Those are totally different levels. Trust is truly a spectrum of things, especially with trauma. [He does little jazzhands.] Its like the world's worst rollercoaster.

[He leans over, taking a closer look. More thoughtful.] I could probably suggest some stuff to eat for fur health. I don't know what kind of diet you've been using, but I've been doing similar for Shadow. His fur was just terrible when he arrived. I remember what Mom suggested for Tails, and fox diets should hopefully be consistent across the multiverse.

Any internal damage would need more like....medical, magical professional thing. And maybe some experiments with chaos energy, but later. Later thing. [His voice is definitely lowered, his ears twitching, but the anxiety Is Real. Its still a lot he's making the offer.]

I know. That's usually how this goes. Either it works out, or I eat dirt, but I...just...have to. [The Anxiety Is So Real.]

....were you testing chaos energy on your Pokemon? [He looks Concerned.]

It can also be how the contact is. Chaos is....malleable like that. Connecting to the quill can cause a shock, but it also does....other stuff.

[He purses his lips.] It does take A LOT to fry....but will she listen if I tell her to leave the area? Just in case?

From:

shatterdriven

Threat wouldn't be what I was aiming for, but I would hit you with something and make you pay for the damages.

And, no offense, but my dad is the current expert on fur upkeep, especially tails. And he insists on all the cooking to make sure my diet is balanced. There's no internal damage thankfully I was at least lucky they were never more than sprained.

[Eating dirt is the best outcome.]

I asked their help, yes. Just touching quill and then a tiny bit of channels energy. I wanted to be sure if it was safe for them, or they should fully avoid it. Ridge and Echo especially because they like to be in the lab.

As far as Birdie goes, it depends on her assessment of the situation. If she deems it worth the risk to help you then she won't leave.

From:

sonic_wachowski

I mean, you could try. I think GUN is still trying to figure out if they could bill me for the gravity trap I broke in their headquarters.

Not my fault their 'Team Sonic proof vault' was not, in fact, Team Sonic proof. [Because the vault was ABSOLUTELY designed with them in mind, he was the only one with a steady supply of rings and their AWOL agents hadn't been that long before the heist.]

Hmmm, I wonder if its because the fur was ripped out....though it could also be stress. The rest of your fur still implies fluffy, though it can be hard to judge just HOW fluffy you guys are supposed to be, dunno why my world is just that much fluffier.

...can you fly with just the two?

[Excuse you, there was no dirt eating. A lot of posturing on Morty's side, and Sonic poking for weak points because provocation is the name of the people reading game.]

So it could be the shock, but did you account for like the energy surge affect? No, wait, bad wording. Energy caffeine. THAT affect?

How fast can she fly? No, wait, how far can she see? And she does like...think? Or is it just number crunching?

From:

shatterdriven

I can. Even if I miss once or twice. I can and have hit Sonic, and I train with Shadow weekly here.

...lack of a hairbrush? But no, foxes have bushy tails. Mine just aren't anymore. Even close to three years here and a year of that being with my dad around.

And yeah, I can fly. Maybe not as fast as some but without trouble.

[He also didn't get rid of the data, so it didn't actually work out unless he only wanted a copy for himself.]

Luxray took to the boost you're referring to. The other two didn't but also probably wouldn't like to try again long enough to see. And my Quagsire...probably wouldn't show signs either way so I've got no data there.

And lastly, she can keep up with you unless you start pushing your upper speeds. But she'll catch up quickly once you do. She can see about 300 yards. More if the terrain's fairly flat.